Life isn’t a bed of roses but an upright soul mate does ease the pain. So at the threshold of adulthood, we must let our childhood fantasies of ‘prince charming’ elude and allow soberness to dawn. When making the most crucial call in life we must not be swayed away by material parameters which make a mark nowhere in the years to roll. So, before all, question yourself what do you want from life and what do you expect your spouse to be?
Let’s delve directly into the traits you might be abstractly searching for in your idealistic soul mate, but perhaps could not figure out with precision.
To say it grossly,
“Love doesn’t gaurantee respect, but respect does”
If your soul mate loves you, essentially doesn’t imply he/she respects you. But if your partner respects you, sooner or later, love would blossom and last through all seasons of life- spring and autumn.
Respect is shown in simple gestures and doesn’t need a word of mouth. If you share a difference, not making it obvious before a third person is respect. If you drop a glass, then saying it was a slip, is a mark of respect. If you commit something to your friend, then keeping your commitment is respect.
Respect means knowing that each of you are at an equal footing in a relationship. No ones superior or inferior and both of you have an equal say in everything.
VALUES YOUR ASPIRATION:
Your soul mate must be your stimulus pushing you through your limits. He should share your dreams, be a part of them. He should be your prime applauder at the instance of glory and be your shoulder whenever you trip. He must be the one who brings out the best in you and believes in you even when you fail to.
The ability to find good in all and everything is quintessential for a happy life. Optimism brings in a ray of hope even when life is through its worst. A constantly complaining and a grumpy partner makes life dreadful. An optimistic partner can set your lips in an upward curve even in the gloomiest of hours.
You surely know this. So what makes me reiterate this?
A reality check!
If you have an urge to check your better halves’ cell phone or email every now and then, where’s the trust?
If you fall prey to everyone’s notion and haste to a conclusion without finding out with your partner, where’s the trust?
If she doesn’t tell you something could be because she did not feel it is important enough, or didn’t want to bother you or thought you were too busy or might have simply forgotten. Who knows she might have some surprise plans for you!
Not just your soul mate, but both of you should allow each other some ‘me’ time. He might want to spend some time with old buddies. She might want to go shopping with friends or just be quiet for sometime. Give each other that space. For you know, she would only come back to you with re-energized love.
Both of you must share the same mental frequency and be able to communicate to one another without any filter. There should absolutely be no fear of judgement and let your true selves out without any second thoughts.
A thing to remember. Do not choose for yourself a life partner. Find out for yourself a soul partner. For lives may part, souls can never.
“…and when one of them meets the other half, the actual half of himself, whether he be a lover of youth or a lover of another sort, the pair are lost in an amazement of love and friendship and intimacy and one will not be out of the other’s sight, as I may say, even for a moment…”– Plato